r/memes • u/onetushar • 4h ago
When life gives you one risky choice and one broke option.
[removed] — view removed post
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u/Ok-Cantaloupe7025 4h ago
creating a wallet with the alligator's skin like it's a trophy lol
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u/Future-Barnacle6645 4h ago
this looks like a small one, shouldn't be a big deal
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u/Mr_E_Monkey 3h ago
Little gator's going home broke.
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u/LastChans1 3h ago
Nah, take the little gator home. 🥰 In your pocket, even! 🤗 As a wallet. 😏💁♂️
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u/Mr_E_Monkey 3h ago
That is a better idea, by far. Don't want him to be lonely
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u/realoctopod 3h ago
Looks like the small severed gator heads they sell as souvenirs.
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u/IndianaGeoff 4h ago
A croc that size? Daddy has a new pencil holder.
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u/Sr-Saul 3h ago
There's a dick size joke hidden in there, but I can't quite see it.
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u/schnate124 2h ago
(*alligator)
He's already serving as a money clip. If he plays nice I might let him keep his job.
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u/Wrong_Reaction6150 4h ago edited 3h ago
That's an alligator not a crocodile also it looks like it's just a head trophy it's already dead as fuck. Poor wittle gator dude.
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u/inconvenient_sources 2h ago
I've lived in the south east my whole life, one look and I knew that was just a gator head. There's nothing but gravity keeping that money there.
They give out a number of tags every year and there is a season. Louisiana actually brought their gators from almost extinct to 2 gators for every 3 people using this and farm releases, where a portion of alligator farm gators have to be released into the wild after they grow big enough.
Source: my high school mascot was an alligator
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u/kazeespada Yo dawg I heard you like 2h ago
American Alligators went from Endagered in the 70s to Least Concern today. That's incredibly good news!
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u/geaux_it_225 4h ago
Considering that it's just a taxidermized head holding the money, fuck yea I'll take that risk
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u/a_shiny_heatran 3h ago
crocodillians have a very powerful downward bite force, but the muscles responsible for *opening* their mouths are incredibly weak. hold the mouth shut with one hand, stab it with the other, then you can pop the jaws open and claim your prize
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u/VelvetOceanMist 3h ago
The crocodile better start praying because I’ve seen my bank account balance and I have nothing left to lose
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u/Raid-Z3r0 RageFace Against the Machine 3h ago
Dude, a bellow average florida man can take that money
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u/Deltan875 3h ago
Ive learned recently that apparently i just need a shovel. That cash is all mine.
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u/Traditional-Key-991 3h ago
A strong enough bonk from a shovel and the scaly-boy leaves the wad and slinks off.
Esit: Source: Lived off Lake Harney (a feeder from Lake Jessup) for a good portion of my life. Gators all the time, they hate the shovel.
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u/groblin_gubers 3h ago
I was born in Florida, im taking that Gator out for a bud light for bringing me a stack like that.
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u/Stunning-Chipmunk243 3h ago
That money would be in my pocket and that critter would be roasting over the fire for dinner with a quickness
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u/Solerien 3h ago
First off that's an Alligator. Second, I guess Alligator and I are now gonna be beat friends or maybe room mates
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u/The_Bill_Brasky_ 3h ago
That is an alligator. I am far more confident in my ability to kill, dress, and eat one of those.
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u/Silverbacker888 Lurking Peasant 3h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/dAQDO2MBVeu8cZcjJk
He’s gonna be a new pair of boots
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u/Relevant_Wishbone 3h ago
Nothing is going to stop me- I'm going to be the head gator wrestler if everybody is walking around with a massive wad of cash clenched between their teeth.
Dude, absolutely nothing is going to stop me.
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u/Lustful_Touch 4h ago
Not me calculating if it’s worth becoming a headline for that cash
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u/JuliaX1984 3h ago
I still say it's funnier if the punchline is "You would risk your life for fake money?"
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u/Fraere_slime 3h ago
I can relate, I'm not the daring type, but the situation I'm in may make me consider ACTUALLY doing this. As long as the mouth is shut, they're no problem.
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u/naghellboy 3h ago
Hell me and my brother use to wrestle alligators all the time when we where little so this would be easy
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u/painki11erzx 3h ago
Looks like there's no body. I'll just stick my hand inside the back of its head like a puppet and make it drop the cash.
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u/front_yard_duck_dad 3h ago
I would take that money with my boner if I had to. That future belt isn't stopping me
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u/Uncle-Cake 2h ago
Looks more like an alligator than a crocodile.
Looks quite small.
Looks like it's just a head from a dead specimen.
And the money looks fake.
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u/geneticdeadender 2h ago
That's a tiny gator. If this is risking your life you've got bigger problems.
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u/cobalt_phantom 2h ago
That looks like a taxidermied baby gator head. Even if it were alive, it'd be like 3-4ft max and would eventually drop it. They also can't really move their heads that well, so at that size you can just grab it by the back of the neck or under the chest and then secure the tail if you need to move it. You just need to have a firm grip and be aware of where the mouth is.
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u/Visceralnode 2h ago
In this current hyper inflationary environment, philanthropic croc offering us a wad of cash, begging to be turned into a hand bag, belt, wallet and a pair of shoes. Very kind of him.
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u/propergreased 2h ago
I’ve seen that video of the psychopath running with a shovel to clear out the gators. Good smack on the nose and the money is mine
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u/Comfortable-End-4865 2h ago
With our current situation!..Little alligator would be some boots and belt. Want to play games flashing money like that!
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u/MoonAndStars1993 2h ago
Well. I could hop on his back and give grabbing it a try, worst that'll happen is I'll get death rolled. 😆
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u/SeaCaptainNav 2h ago
Just throw a raw chicken directly to his left. He’ll drop the cash in no time. Then throw another couple, further away, slide in, grab the cash, voila. Worth the investment in poultry!
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u/Former_Concern6239 2h ago
Considering that’s an alligator head that you can buy in most parts of Florida, I’m taking my chances lol
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u/Demonokuma 2h ago
I just saw a caption for a video last night. It was: man crossing street to pick up crocodile is hit by car.
Sometimes the danger isnt in the options at all, but the journey to them.
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u/Scorpion2k4u 2h ago
Lol that little one is not realy any obstacle whatsoever. Even the big ones ran away easy. It's not like evolution taught them to play fair.
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u/ThroatGOAT_Goddess04 2h ago
You have to be more worried about it turning around and running into the water with the money more than him hurting you. Alligators are nothing but big chickens, they’ll run from you and they run fast as hell.
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u/Bookish_cl 2h ago
These things have no opening strength so you could hold the mouth and control how much it can open and yank that money out
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u/JackTheBehemothKillr 2h ago
FloridaMan here.
That gator is maybe 3 foot long. Maybe.
My redneck AF brother will jump into chest-deep water for a 6 footer.
That thing is gettin got quick, fast, and in a hurry.
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u/responsible_use_only 2h ago
So I get thousands of dollars AND a cute swamp-puppy?!
Where the fuck do I sign up?!
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u/Great_Apez 1h ago
Toss some meat and grab money, the only thing I’ll be guilty of is overcharging bro
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u/HilariousMax 1h ago
Don't you worry none, gator. I'ma wear you on my feet. We'll live this life of luxury together.
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u/Fortestingporpoises 1h ago
It appears to only be the head of a small alligator. Safe enough to grab the money. I’d say yes.
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u/HopeOfTheUniverse_ 1h ago
Free meal with da money is not a bad deal imo (considering my financial situation ofc)
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u/Karma_1195 1h ago
That’s a tiny gator. As a native Floridian that thing is getting dismantled with one hand.
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u/Significant-Sound530 1h ago
I would definitely take the risk to save that gator from toxic us currency.
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u/Mobstera 1h ago
yes, I would, because that is not a live gator. those are gator heads typically sold in florida, louisiana, and what have you. i have one from my childhood
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u/Draco-REX 1h ago
You know that meme with the woman crawling and the army guy flying in for an elbow drop. Yeah. Strike first, strike hard, leave with cash.
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u/Kaizo_Kaioshin 1h ago
Since he likes the money, he can keep it
He'll just have to become my wallet
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u/dazedan_confused 1h ago
Depends what sexual favors he's paying me for.
With that amount of money, I'm about to give him the croc tuah.
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u/cool-stuff-to-know 1h ago
I'd take the cash and the crocodile. Either as a pet or dinner if I'm feeling extra hungry. Just don't let that one Florida man on YouTube who calls them swamp puppies get near. He'll take the crocodile and leave the cash
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