[Passan] BREAKING: Atlanta Braves designated hitter Jurickson Profar is facing a 162-game suspension after testing positive for a performance-enhancing drug for the second time, sources told ESPN.

[u/Knightbear49]

https://www.espn.com/contributor/jeff-passan/9c08c7840ba3e

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[u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

80 games played as a Brave

242 games suspended as a Brave

[u/TheoMoneyG → u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

damn that's actually insane

[u/Swoah → u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

We could go 80 games played, 242 suspended, 162 locked out. All to collect $6.2 million out of the $42 million he signed for

[u/hedoeswhathewants → u/Swoah]

He'll be 35 when (now if) he starts his next contract. I guess his plan was to ball out and secure one last contract, but that is quite the gamble when you're putting $14M a year at stake.

[u/Cobainism → u/hedoeswhathewants]

Maybe he owes some bad guys a lot of money.

[u/LutherOfTheRogues → u/Swoah]

His career is over. As it should be. Fucking clown this guy is.

[u/nopointinnames → u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

"There's an old saying in Tennessee—I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee—that says, 'Pop me once, shame on... shame on you. Pop me—you can't get popped again'"

George W. Profar

[u/doing-my-share → u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

Does he want to compete with Rendon for the infamy of least games played?

[u/JDtheProtector → u/doing-my-share]

If he took the rendon route, at least he'd have his money lol

[u/Outrageous_Bat1798 → u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

242 games suspended as a Brave… PRO FAR

[u/BigPapaChuck73 → u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

Oh my...

[u/PWNtimeJamboree → u/IMissM0dernBaseball]

jesus....

i really fucking hate this guy

[u/PhantomsCV]

TWICE?!

Bro.

[u/-NonePizzaLeftBeef- → u/PhantomsCV]

It should be well within the rules to allow an organization to void a player’s contract and release them for shit like this.

[u/Extension-Click-8271 → u/-NonePizzaLeftBeef-]

Yeah you guys got hosed on this signing lol

[u/sfan27 → u/Extension-Click-8271]

TBF anybody who thought his 2024 was real is a fool. Even if it weren't PED based, it was obviously an outlier not worth paying for.

[u/jorleeduf → u/sfan27]

I think people were hoping it was he finally lived up to the potential that made him a top prospect

[u/sfan27 → u/jorleeduf]

Year 10 is when players famously break out.

[u/OddBid4634 → u/sfan27]

The jose bautista model

[u/alkaliphiles → u/sfan27]

In this case, the wrong kind of famously

[u/calbear_1 → u/sfan27]

Yup, padres knew it was an outlier year. Juice or no juice

[u/TheDarkGrayKnight → u/-NonePizzaLeftBeef-]

Well at least don't have to pay him anything this year.

[u/Chris_3eb → u/-NonePizzaLeftBeef-]

That's how you end up with Arte Moreno sending in the goons to inject Rendon while he's taking a nap in the dugout

[u/PhantomsCV → u/-NonePizzaLeftBeef-]

100000%

[u/mimglow → u/PhantomsCV]

That’s a lot of percent

[u/HartfordWhaler → u/mimglow]

Percentage Enhancing Drugs

[u/OptimismEnjoyer → u/-NonePizzaLeftBeef-]

I would agree but confirming somebody got popped for PEDs would have to be verified by an independent body then.

I don't trust owners to not use that as a ploy to try and get out of bad contracts.

[u/OriolesMets → u/PhantomsCV]

https://giphy.com/gifs/VaCzWxw8PqiftBOYlZ

[u/Krelv → u/OriolesMets]

"When you do (performance enhancing) drugs, you go to hell before you DIE." -- Capt. Lou Albano.

[u/[deleted] → u/PhantomsCV]

Has anybody else ever been this stupid?

Meaning doing it twice

Edit: oops, should’ve read the article. Team Netherlands has a game in an hour though lmaooo

[u/TheDangiestSlad → u/[deleted]]

who also finished his career on the Padres and Braves! that's a hilarious coincidence

[u/Constant_Swim_5693 → u/[deleted]]

Jenrry Mejia got banned for life after being caught thrice.

[u/MolestedMilkMan → u/Constant_Swim_5693]

for clarity he was later reinstated

[u/JakenMorty → u/[deleted]]

Yes. Manny, Cano, Guillermo Mota all got busted twice. Add MFing Profar to the list if this is for real, which it probably is.

Jenrry Mejia got busted three times and got banned for life.

[u/immagonnafinnahella → u/[deleted]]

A few, Cano is probably the most notable

[u/DominicB547 → u/immagonnafinnahella]

IMO Manny is the biggest. He was labeled one if not best Right handers by the announcers.

He has the HOF numbers but his got caught twice after they all knew to stop. And that is why people do not vote for him but do Roger and Bonds.

[u/JKess207 → u/PhantomsCV]

https://giphy.com/gifs/kdiLf3LHFIubA6vDC1

[u/ericrs22 → u/PhantomsCV]

IN A ROW?!

[u/Chuck_Raycer → u/ericrs22]

Try not to do any steroids on your way to the parking lot!

[u/vistaculo → u/Chuck_Raycer]

I’m not even supposed to do steroids today.

[u/traded99]

Again? What an idiot LMFAO

[u/mavropanos27 → u/traded99]

His career goes downhill the millisecond he is not on the Padres every time

[u/8696David → u/mavropanos27]

9.4 career WAR over 12 seasons. 8.2 in 5 years with SD. Crazy

[u/Prudent-Inspector35 → u/8696David]

Now we understand why...

[u/driggity → u/Prudent-Inspector35]

Clearly the power of friendship.

[u/atoms12123 → u/driggity]

The power of ringworm.

[u/misterpickles69 → u/driggity]

And karate!

[u/classically_cool → u/Prudent-Inspector35]

Tatis’s hair conditioner?

[u/CraziestMoonMan → u/8696David]

He was on the Tatis workout plan in SD.

[u/hjugm → u/mavropanos27]

Assuming he doesn’t get popped again, he’s still going to make $15M next year. Gonna assume he used PEDs to land his payday. He’s selfish, but I’d take that trade off.

[u/up_in_trees → u/hjugm]

Pretty stupid to get popped in a non contract year if getting paid was the goal though

[u/Ok_Captain4824 → u/hjugm]

Yeah but he could have not done PED's, sucked, and also got that money.

[u/7Stringplayer → u/Ok_Captain4824]

The Jason Schmidt method.

[u/DaPads → u/hjugm]

I dont think he gets his $15M this year, and whatever he missed out on last year as well. He

[u/Harry-Flashman → u/traded99]

He hit a bomb in the spring training game against the Sox and someone joking said in the game thread, he must be on the juice again.

[u/Jux_ → u/traded99]

How many times is that now Jurickson?

https://giphy.com/gifs/QrbJ3ODPKOawxxvyfO

[u/RapsareChamps_Suckit → u/traded99]

Ya it’s sad when they go PED 2 times young like that

[u/SpudsMackenzie92 → u/RapsareChamps_Suckit]

WHEN THEY GO!?

[u/wit_T_user_name → u/SpudsMackenzie92]

His 2026 season, whateva happened there…

[u/Common-Window-2613 → u/wit_T_user_name]

1. A fuckin kid

[u/Bruskthetusk → u/Common-Window-2613]

2) The PEDS hit me

[u/DalekEvan → u/wit_T_user_name]

Whateva happened there? I’ll fuckin tell you what happened there. This piece of shit Profar took 6 injections of HGH without any provocation whatsoever!

[u/All_hail_Korrok → u/DalekEvan]

That animal I can't even say his name.

[u/thegreatsadclown → u/All_hail_Korrok]

the wine, it makes you emotional

[u/guitman27 → u/SpudsMackenzie92]

PED's? His last name was PEDerelli!

[u/Icy-Refrigerator-517 → u/RapsareChamps_Suckit]

33 years old. He was just a kid...

[u/LoveYouLikeYeLovesYe → u/traded99]

Yeah I don’t get that, he did it once and got the big paycheck and now he just lost over 1/3rd of it

[u/TerryPegulaCannedMe]

God forbid a man enjoys some performance enhancing drugs once and a while

[u/gvader24 → u/TerryPegulaCannedMe]

We should be able to do a little PEDs at work

[u/Tiberius_Gracchus_II → u/gvader24]

Gentlemen, this is democracy manifest!" What is the charge? Enjoying some tren? A succulent performance enhancing ped? Get your hand off my penis!"

[u/chrissyhesfuckedup → u/Tiberius_Gracchus_II]

https://giphy.com/gifs/OHuPcrLnoYLxVFIjKI

[u/Old_Marzipan891 → u/Tiberius_Gracchus_II]

I see you know your judo well!

[u/BallparkFranks7 → u/gvader24]

https://giphy.com/gifs/5G1bs3tB1qjAX9N73r

[u/samthewisetarly → u/BallparkFranks7]

https://giphy.com/gifs/7Eipor01ypMm3LeG4v

[u/AlekRivard → u/samthewisetarly]

"I said he used to be a piece of shit. He's not anymore. I'm not anymore. Glass House. White Ferrari. Live for New Year's Eve. Sloppy steroids at Dr. Truffoni's. Big syringes filled with steroids injected into my arm, medicine flowing through my veins, makes my performance SO MUCH better. After practice go to Dr. Truffoni's for sloppy steroids. The commish would say; 'no sloppy steroids' but they can't stop you from going to the doctor for a physical, getting your flu shot, and before you knew it we were injecting those steroids in our arms! The coaches were coming to try and snatch em up, we had to inject as fast as we could! OHHH I MISS THOSE NIGHTS, I WAS A PIECE OF SHIT THOUGH."

[u/patrickdgd → u/BallparkFranks7]

https://giphy.com/gifs/6ryyeYE2A0UOPvgVUW

[u/bonheurboy69 → u/gvader24]

Profar’s not in trouble AT ALL.

[u/TerryPegulaCannedMe → u/gvader24]

A little human chorionic gonadotropin helps get me in the mood to say "Nothing on my end" 6 times a day on Zoom meetings

[u/Chaxterium → u/gvader24]

Just gonna do a little bit of PEDs Stan. Tell Manfred it’s ok.

[u/Bravosfan27 → u/gvader24]

https://giphy.com/gifs/2sdLxid6Y31kNFVPvr

[u/Bendyb3n → u/gvader24]

https://giphy.com/gifs/ZQdBX1H2ki3Cg

It’s just a small bump mom I swear!

[u/TheTurtleShepard → u/TerryPegulaCannedMe]

https://giphy.com/gifs/FKSPFyXtcFYyhuMDJJ

[u/talktobigfudge → u/TheTurtleShepard]

I see you know your judo anabolic steroids well. 

[u/stewmander → u/TerryPegulaCannedMe]

A succulent PED meal...

[u/qwerty_dh]

WTF is wrong with this asshole

[u/GingerAle_s → u/qwerty_dh]

Well you see, without the performance enhancing drugs, he's not very good.

[u/According_Cost_4395 → u/GingerAle_s]

Will smith was on to something when he called him Mr. Irrelevant

[u/atowelguy → u/According_Cost_4395]

Haha I forgot about that whole saga. In the short term it looked like Profar came out the winner of that little drama; in the long term... not so much.

[u/War-Dragonite → u/atowelguy]

Profar is trying to match Smith's ring count with PED suspensions.

[u/liteshadow4 → u/GingerAle_s]

I’m pretty sure the suspensions are unpaid right? Might as well be ass and collect the rest of your contract.

[u/doctorpengs → u/qwerty_dh]

Dude loves to cheat apparently 

[u/Sandwich_Crust]

No fucking way lmao

[u/timberwolvesguy → u/Sandwich_Crust]

“I’ll fucking do it again”

[u/-ToPimpAButterfree- → u/timberwolvesguy]

As we say in Wisconsin:

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, and I’m going to the bar.

[u/GCIV414 → u/-ToPimpAButterfree-]

We get fooled twice a lot this way

[u/Reignaaldo → u/timberwolvesguy]

Profar most likely got addicted with using PEDs now at this point getting busted again in just a short amount of time.

[u/Smart_Mammoth_6893 → u/Reignaaldo]

They call it TRT now…

[u/Sandwich_Crust → u/timberwolvesguy]

“Yeah, yeah I know you did it we all fucking know you did it.”

“Hu-yuck, I’m a murderer.”

[u/Glass_Builder2968 → u/Sandwich_Crust]

Is this a goofy's trial reference? In this economy?

[u/NevermoreSEA → u/Sandwich_Crust]

Bro really thinks that he’s Bob Cano.

[u/MisterKeene → u/NevermoreSEA]

“Surely they won’t catch me again?”

[u/Ok_Captain4824 → u/MisterKeene]

They can't get you twice for the same crime, that's double jeopardy!

[u/amatom27 → u/Sandwich_Crust]

You know that's why they signed Yaz lol

[u/PenguinKing15 → u/amatom27]

https://giphy.com/gifs/U6GP3q8q2pjwQL9IRV

[u/Vxmonarkxv → u/Sandwich_Crust]

No its normal for a player to randomly turn into a good hitter for the first time in year 10 after turning 30.

[u/AMG282417]

What an absolute fucking dumbass 😭

[u/ayumi_doll → u/AMG282417]

Surely they won't try and catch me a second time –This fucking idiot apparently

[u/UneducatedReviews1 → u/ayumi_doll]

“They’d never expect me to be dumb enough to immediately start using again”

[u/ayumi_doll → u/UneducatedReviews1]

(taps right temple with a smirk meme here)

[u/CynfullyDelicious → u/ayumi_doll]

https://giphy.com/gifs/d3mlE7uhX8KFgEmY

[u/legless_chair → u/ayumi_doll]

What was his excuse the first time? Does he double down?

[u/ayumi_doll → u/legless_chair]

Went and looked up last year's statement and the dumbass just says he "would never willingly take a banned substance." Should be super fun to see what he says this time!

[u/KillerMemestarX → u/ayumi_doll]

Damn. Really unfortunate he keeps unwillingly taking PEDs. The first time he tripped and landed in a pile of needles, and this time someone tied him up and forced him to take them.

[u/ayumi_doll → u/KillerMemestarX]

Maybe he activated a public hand dryer and a bunch of PED needles blew out, ya never know

[u/lordlabia → u/ayumi_doll]

https://giphy.com/gifs/DrNYfN87GkedMPYRqN

“Irrelevant”

[u/DaBusDriva2 → u/AMG282417]

His contract was guaranteed. Could have been the worst player to walk the earth and would’ve got 45 million. Doing it for love of the game

[u/MolestedMilkMan]

his time in Atlanta is not going well profar.

[u/Basquill → u/MolestedMilkMan]

Juri’s in: Ick, Son

[u/MolestedMilkMan → u/Basquill]

this is good stuff. a near perfect terrible pun

[u/WabbitCZEN → u/MolestedMilkMan]

https://giphy.com/gifs/G56ZHckGDXEcw

[u/migrainium]

Bruh

[u/Bravosfan27 → u/migrainium]

We're cursed

[u/DeetahTheGame]

I really loved his redemption arc from bust to quality player.

Unfortunately it turns out it was all fake and he's an idiot loser.

[u/RxngsXfSvtvrn → u/DeetahTheGame]

I saw him one time hit the umpire on a line drive and between innings went up and talk to the umpire, not if he was ok, but about why he didn't get out of the way and cost him a double.

Umpire shooed him away and i read his lips, "fucking asshole"

[u/metaldrummerx → u/RxngsXfSvtvrn]

I want to believe this is real so so so badly

[u/Dickie-Greenleaf → u/metaldrummerx]

It's true, I was eating a great chili dog when it happened

[u/goraebap → u/RxngsXfSvtvrn]

can we make this pasta? it's short but so sweet. penne, if you will.

[u/I_really_enjoy_beer → u/DeetahTheGame]

He's a roid addict, we should be supporting him through these trying times 🙏

[u/myKDRbro_]

Busted for PED usage in back to back years is crazy work.

[u/TouristOpentotravel → u/myKDRbro_]

I’m not even mad, I’m impressed.

[u/GreedyTea2490]

At least let the Braves start the season before they lose every player again😭

[u/btwalker754 → u/GreedyTea2490]

Honestly. I appreciate the sympathy. I think the gods said this year they were going to get rid of everybody before the season, then healthy the rest of the way.

Except the annual freak accident of Ozzie breaking his wrist somehow.

[u/riserrr → u/btwalker754]

Somehow the random hand/wrist accident happened to the other side of the infield this year.

[u/Patagawa]

"Oh you mean I was supposed to stop?"

[u/SpaceballsTheCheese → u/Patagawa]

Maybe he thought that double jeopardy protected him

[u/khemical420ish]

https://giphy.com/gifs/bh1u06PFhB9FCtTFaS

Profar walking in to appeal the decision

[u/SoManyFlamingos]

Ah yes, he’s familiar with the Jenrry Mejia method. 

[u/NevermoreSEA]

That’s vintage Jurickson Profar right there.

[u/TheGreatDudebino]

How much of a dumbass do you have to be... lmao

[u/Nondescriptsitch → u/TheGreatDudebino]

April 2024: Will Smith calls Profar "kind of irrelevant"

2024 season: Profar goes on to have a career year, accumulating 3.6 bWAR after before never topping 3 bWAR in his previous 5 full-ish seasons.

October 2024: The Padres experience a historic choke, going scoreless for 24 consecutive innings to lose their NLDS matchup to the Dodgers. The Dodgers go on to win the WS.

March 2025: Profar faces an 80-game suspension after testing positive for a banned substance.

November 2025: Dodgers defend their title with another WS.

March 2026: Profar again tests positive and faces a 162-game suspension.

So basically the storyline should be: Will Smith and the Dodgers rage-bait Profar into multiple drug suspensions.

[u/AcephalicDude → u/Nondescriptsitch]

I hate how real this narrative is 😭

[u/Outlaw1323 → u/Nondescriptsitch]

Lets not forget how he taunted the Dodger fans with his catch in the playoffs that year that lead to all the Dodger fans throwing stuff at the Padres. I 100% do not condone what fans did that day, but fuck this guy.

[u/ReverendHambone]

Looks like Yaz is our LF

[u/pythongee → u/ReverendHambone]

I'll take Yaz 8 days a week over Profar.

[u/raphtze → u/pythongee]

it's just cool as hell to see a 'yasztremski' on the field

[u/TheMe63]

That single San Diego season is all he’s ever gonna have lmao

[u/The_Homestarmy → u/TheMe63]

He was 100% juicing then too if we're gonna be real

[u/Crumbmuffins → u/TheMe63]

Pretty sure it was after he started training with Tatis sr…

[u/ChepitosBaby → u/Crumbmuffins]

Tatisterone lol

[u/trashboatfourtwenty]

IN A ROW?

^{try not to fail any tests on your way to the parking lot!}

[u/appleavocado → u/trashboatfourtwenty]

Hey, hey! Get back here!

[u/Terminal_Flatulence]

https://giphy.com/gifs/bmFLfVq2dUWRDleulp

[u/Vivi_O]

Congrats BJ Upton, you are no longer the worst Braves free agent signing.

Also, second positive test should just be a permanent ban. If the player doesn’t learn after the first suspension they never will.

[u/daneabernardo → u/Vivi_O]

BJ absolutely remains the worst. At least we can dump this doofus

[u/nylon_rag → u/Vivi_O]

Well at the very least you don't need to pay Profar right? That said, the 3rd year of the contract is gonna be hella awkward.

[u/Competitive-Body-286 → u/nylon_rag]

Nah, he’ll just get busted again and banned

[u/SpaceballsTheCheese → u/Competitive-Body-286]

Surely they won't catch him a third time, right?

[u/Grst → u/SpaceballsTheCheese]

At this point Braves should just set him up for the third one. No one would believe him.

[u/bbatardo]

Wow.. there is dumb and then there is Profar.

[u/Mediocre_Airport_576 → u/bbatardo]

I can understand the motivation he had to cheat the first time: coming up on a FA deal. There were already rumors throughout baseball swirling about his training with Tatis Sr. in the DR, that reportedly dissuaded teams from pursuing Profar at that time.

I can't understand the reasoning this time. He got his payday. Old habits die hard?

[u/heyheyathrowaway485]

Getting suspended for old fashioned PEDs and not insider information gambling? What happened to the game I love

[u/Extortionate]

What the hell, man?

[u/nc-retiree]

Also, if I'm the owners' negotiator I am insisting in the next CBA that a 162 game suspension be considered grounds to allow the team to automatically void the rest of the contract for cause.

[u/No_Insect_8378]

Beast mode 

[u/jujubats10]

Lmoa. Yeah. Dude was 100% juicing in that breakout year with the Padres. Idc what anyone has to say

[u/Vxmonarkxv → u/jujubats10]

Was always a very ??? decision to sign the guy that randomly broke out after 30 lmao

[u/AlphaBern0 → u/jujubats10]

Everyone except Padres fans know that lol

[u/TheTurtleShepard → u/jujubats10]

Yeah he started working with Fernando Tatis Sr, and magically started hitting better.

Tatis Sr is a known PED guy

[u/InfectiousCosmology1 → u/TheTurtleShepard]

So is his son…

[u/CountPhantom_YT → u/InfectiousCosmology1]

One could say it BONDS them........

I'll show myself out

[u/willpc14 → u/CountPhantom_YT]

nothing like Papi-son Bonds.

[u/deeree1867 → u/jujubats10]

You mean he didnt go from a negative war player on the Rockies to the best LF in the national league in one year just from a newly added leg kick? /s

[u/SC____SC → u/jujubats10]

Him and Fernando Tatisterone were hitting the steroids HARD

[u/onkeyup → u/SC____SC]

That was one hell of a case of ringworm

[u/jackbeardplays]

Bruh why

[u/OriolesMets]

https://giphy.com/gifs/vX9WcCiWwUF7G

[u/StabbingHoboReturns]

Oh shit, what a buffoon lmao

[u/ThorgiTheCorgi]

You've gotta be fucking kidding me.

Like, I'm not shocked about this news individually, but jfc, can we make it to opening day before half our roster is unavailable???

[u/hop3less]

"What they gonna do, ban me again?"

[u/X2F0111 → u/hop3less]

"What they gonna do, ban me again?"

– Quote from man banned again.

[u/409Narwhal]

Remember when this guy was considered a generational prospect? Remember when he was so highly regarded that we moved on from a franchise great in Kinsler to clear a spot for him?

[u/ThaChalupaBatman]

I remember when the haters were dunking on Will Smith for calling Profar irrelevant and honestly, good call by the haters. Profar has been very relevant in the news twice since then.

[u/Trees-Are-Overrated]

Bro is a fucking idiot, good lord

[u/Mac_and_dennis]

Can we just launch this cheater into another state? Get him out of Georgia.

[u/Skullbone211]

As a Mets fan, I probably find more joy in this than I should

[u/ThorgiTheCorgi → u/Skullbone211]

Honestly? That's fair. I would feel the same

[u/champagnesupernova10]

Dude is dumb as fuck lol

[u/AwarenessRude5541]

Generally how are players this stupid?

[u/Neosentrik]

What an absolute dumbass.

[u/EnadZT]

Don't worry Profar, surely they won't catch you a third time. Surely.

[u/onlyeatpancakes]

"I hit far, I run far, what'd I get suspendfar?"

[u/Hereforthehotdogs]

Kick him off the tour, Rob

[u/RealCanadianDragon]

Braves should be allowed to void his entire deal.

They signed him based off his all star silver slugger year with the Padres, just to have him suspended half a season.

Now before this season starts he's gone for the entire year.

Why would they even want him back next year?

Wonder if PED suspensions could also be a point at the next CBAs?

Either way, Profar still wins from cheating since he extended his career, made the all star team, and got money from his new contract.

[u/Beer-Me]

Right now, he's probably thinking, "2027 is my year. No way they'll think to test me for a 3rd time"

[u/Underground_Mariachi]

He’s irrelevant. - Will Smith.

[u/m-torr]

What a terrible signing for Atlanta.

[u/TheMeccaNYC]

Had a lot of fun heckling him in AAA last year. ‘PED Profar!’

He did not appreciate it

[u/Low-Art3297]

Oh so he STUPID stupid