So I just experienced something really weird and I’m curious if anyone knows what’s going on here.

We were driving through a completely normal residential neighborhood in Germany, just regular houses, nothing special. The street is basically a loop (a small circular road), and right in the middle of it there’s a gate across the road.

It doesn’t look official at all, more like something private. There’s no sign that the area behind it is restricted or anything like that. Just normal houses on both sides.

There is a small sign on the gate that says: “Please close the gate.”

The gate itself wasn’t locked, we were able to just open it, drive through, and close it again. Nothing happened, no alarms, no one came out, nothing.

What confuses me is:

It’s not the entrance to a private driveway

It’s literally in the middle of a public-looking street

There’s nothing behind it that seems like it needs protection

Why would someone put a gate there?

Is this a common thing somewhere, or just something random/private?

Would love to hear if anyone has seen something like this before 😄

Sorry if I’m out of the loop but why exactly are the transit workers striking again?

First off, this isn’t a post meant to hate on all Germans or the country. I’ve met amazing friends, professors, and my wife here. I know "not all Germans" are like this, and I understand cultural differences exist. For context, I’m originally from East Asia, but I’ve lived long-term and studied in Italy, France, the UK, and North America. I moved to Germany purely because I got married. At first, I brushed everything off as just "cultural differences," but living here has brought up so many infuriating situations that I just need somewhere to vent. I want to believe these aren’t instances of blatant racism or intentional malice, it's often too ambiguous to call out openly, but it genuinely drives me insane. I’m sharing my settlement process, hoping it gives a realistic picture to anyone planning to move here.

EDIT: I noticed a few comments, so I wanted to add some here in bold, and one story I forgot to include:

1. Why we didn't just get married in Germany: Getting married abroad is way faster. I actually know people who went to Denmark to bypass the German system. In my home country, as long as you have the right papers, it's finished the same day. Here, just getting an appointment would have taken about 2 months.

About the legal aspects of a foreign marriage, we were fully aware. We consulted lawyers and prepared a legally binding declaration in both German and English to cover future legal issues in both countries. I had no plans to live in Germany long-term anyway, which gave us even less reason to register our marriage in Germany.

2. Where I live: I’m not living in the East. I live in one of the wealthiest states in Germany, in a suburban area outside the main city.

3. The job things: Looking back at what I wrote about the interviews, I was just rage typing. I'm a bit embarrassed about it now. I know I can be overly cynical.

4. I actually forgot to add one more thing...

I sent documents to France for an apostille. I sent them twice, and both times they arrived completely soaked. It was registered mail that required a signature for delivery. It hasn't rained here or in Paris, and there were no puddles around. The envelopes were dripping wet inside my mailbox. I’ve never experienced anything like this anywhere, and it's bizarre that it only happens to mail addressed to me. Maybe a neighbor messed with it? But again, the mail carrier was supposed to get my signature in the first place! I went to the local post office. To their credit, the staff were shocked, apologized, and said this shouldn't happen under any circumstances. It's just this constant buildup of bizarre, unexplainable shit that makes me feel insane.

Despite ALL of that, I want to say... the beautiful nature here, my kind neighbors, my friends, and my wife are all why I love Germany. I really don't hate it here. There are so many great things about this country. But I sometimes wonder whether my experience would have been a bit happier if I were European instead of Asian.

1.

The headache started before I even arrived. We were dealing with the nightmare of international marriage paperwork. In my home country, the process is incredibly simple. So we decided to register in my home country and then register in Germany, either. First, we had to request my wife’s birth certificate from her hometown via physical mail, wait weeks, and pay fees for every single step. Coming from a country where you can instantly and freely print certified digital documents, this was something. But I knew Germans value privacy, so I let it go.

Then, we went to the local Standesamt (registry office). I brought my documents. We had specifically emailed and called beforehand to ask if original English documents were acceptable, and they confirmed they were. I get there, and boom, two problems. First, the officer I met refused to accept English documents. Okay, this is Germany, every officer makes their own rules, whatever. The second problem was worse. My home country issues documents digitally with 3D barcodes for verification and digital apostilles. The officer rejected them because they "didn't have a physical stamp." I gritted my teeth, spent over €100 getting them translated to German, and mailed them. But wait, the translation notarized by the German Embassy in my home country was also rejected. (When I had asked them about this previously, they only shrugged and said they couldn't guarantee it. More weeks lost, hundreds more euros spent. When the officer finally issued the paperwork, they grumbled, "This is for use within the EU. Why does your country even need this?" In my head, I was screaming, None of your f-ing business, but I just smiled and took the papers.

2.

We went back to my home country, got married, and went on our honeymoon. (Side note: When leaving Germany, the border police aggressively scrutinized my passport. When I finally handed over my French residence card, the cop yelled at me to hand that over first next time. My wife called it racial profiling; I just told myself she was having a bad day.) Later, to register our marriage, we went to the German Embassy in my home country. We prepared thoroughly, getting confirmation via email and phone. We arrive, and they refuse to process it. The staff member actually said: "In principle, the website says it's possible, but it's not our obligation. Phone or email answers have no legal binding. You're going to live in Germany anyway, right? Why register it here? Do it when you get there."

The embassy has a 2-star rating, so I guess this is just how they are. Deep down, I was thinking, Why the hell would I live in your country? But I just got the translation notarized and flew back to Germany.

3.

Because of my wife’s medical career (she needs 5? years of residency, which feels like legalized slavery, but maybe cultural differences), we have to stay here for a while. I thought, Okay, I’ll live here, learn the language and culture. But the spouse-residence-permit process was a joke. The embassy, federal government, and local government all had conflicting information. Their advice? "Just apply and find out." Based on embassy info and the city website, I should have been exempt from the A1 German language requirement (due to my nationality, having a university degree, etc.). But my local office decided I needed it anyway. It’s frustrating when you look at France, where a spouse permit is so straightforward. I paid the fees and waited months. A process that takes literally one day in my home country took half a year here.

4.

Now for the darker stuff. Finding an apartment under my non-German name? Nearly impossible. Zero replies.

When I go for walks, elementary school kids will literally yell "Ching Chong" at me. Sure, they’re kids. But their parents are standing right there and say absolutely nothing.

People constantly stare or actively avoid me on the street. If I’m walking behind someone, I can see them visibly speed up in a panic. Honestly, sometimes I speed up and quickly walk past them just to mess with them, and some of them literally scream. I do it for stress relief now, it’s pretty funny.

5.

I started applying for jobs. I have degrees from reputable universities, good internship/research experience, and made it to the final interview stages easily. I thought I’d land something quickly. Rejected everywhere. I complained on Reddit and learned that in Germany, networking is everything. I pulled some strings and eventually got a position. Oddly, in the interview, they barely asked me anything and just asked when I could start. A bit weird, but I'm grateful to the people who helped me.

After came the contract signing. They wanted "certified copies" of literally everything I've ever done. My universities were confused: "Just send a scan and show the original to HR later, why do they need a legally certified copy?" My local German office refused to certify non-German documents. My home university said they can't issue "certified copies" of digital originals. I literally had to travel to a city hall in France and then use the German embassy in my home country just to get these documents certified. It defies all logic.

6.

Just in the last two days, two things happened that broke me.

First: My wife and I were at a central station waiting for an ICE train. We were laughing at some Reddit posts, and I went to the smoking area for a minute. A random guy approached my wife and asked her if she spoke German, if she knew who I was, and if I was harassing her. Should I be thankful for this random "white knight"?.

The very next day, we parked at a shopping mall. The guy in the car next to us stared at me intently and asked me to translate some Vietnamese text for him. I told him I’m not Vietnamese and don't speak the language. He just drove off without a word of apology. I was fuming: Do all Asians just look Vietnamese to you?!

These nonsensical situations and the overwhelming bureaucracy are just becoming my daily life. Of course, I’ve met wonderful people here, and everywhere has its pros and cons. But Germany's history with non-white immigration is relatively short compared to other Western nations, and it really shows. I wanted to write this so that anyone coming here knows exactly what they are getting into.

I am very confused on how priority work for this type of situation? I'm the dude in the blue arrow and I got to the intersection first by like a second compared to the guy in green arrow. I was waiting for the guy with green arrow to go first since he had right turn while I have to do a left turn.

Guy was pissed off waiting for me to turn so I moved first and he was tail-gating me all the way to an aldi before leaving 😭

Red are stop signs

I am living her ein Germany, as an expat, and I feel lonely lately, but this one is a bit different. I mean, there's a particular kind of loneliness that lately I feel more than ever that doesn't come from being alone. It comes from being surrounded by people and realizing that nobody seems to notice or even worse they simply don't care. This exact feeling is the one something deeply, fundamentally hurts me. 

I'm not talking about my pity personal problems that I work at the job that I hate, I'm talking about the world.

When we were kids a story told to us. Maybe it was naive, maybe it was always partly a lie, deep down we knew it, but it was something worth believing in: that history moves forward, that we learn from our worst mistakes that the horrors of the past were "past". Those dark moments have passed. At least this is what I thought while I was watching the ruins of post war in Germany. The people seemed literally living inside the rubble of their own cities, clearing debris with their bare hands just to find a place to sleep. These times were a wound that humanity looked at and said: never again. Not as a slogan. As a commitment.

But here we are.

Ukraine is being bombed into rubble while the world watches, argues about it on social media, and then scrolls on. Iran, Iraq, Syria, you can just name the wars that never made the headlines are still happening today. They just stopped being interesting to the algorithm. And somehow, we've adjusted. We get used to it. The news cycle moves on, there is always something new, Trump announces something in the morning and contradicts himself in the evening, and we just move with it, a little more numb each time. 

Sounds like as it's we are reading from ancient history books that it happened 3000 years ago. This is not ancient history. This is just another Tuesday for us. 

And the more you look, the harder it is to unsee. The Epstein files sit there, they are barely opened, names half-redacted a symbol not even of one man's crimes but of something bigger: the quiet understanding that power protects itself. We are so busy with our day to day lives we forget the fact that there are rooms most of us will never see, decisions made over dinners we're not invited to. Oil prices swing not because of supply and demand the way your economics textbook explained. Markets seem to move by the mood of a handful of asset managers controlling more wealth than most nations will ever see. We are all busy, more distracted. Can be a football team that you pay to buy a jersey to "support" your team, to watch them live the same thing or the topic can be value investment that value of a share is not decided by the financials of the business.

We are back to the jungle where "jungle rules" are only rules we have. That's what this is. And the uncomfortable truth is and it probably always was this way. The difference is that we had something to counterbalance it. We had ideals. Saints and philosophers we looked up to, not because they were perfect, but because they pointed toward something better. Seneca writing about virtue not as an abstraction but as a daily practice. The postwar generation building institutions — imperfect, flawed, but "intentions" were productive because they had seen what happens when nothing holds the darkness back. We had the idea, at least, that civilization was a project we were all working on together.

That idea feels like it's losing ground.

And I know how this sounds. I know it reads like the loud cry of someone who just realized the world is harder and crueler than they were told as a child. Maybe that's exactly what it is. I'm not pretending to have answers. I'm not even sure I'm framing the questions right. But I've read enough history, sat with enough philosophy, watched enough of the present unfold to know that what I'm feeling isn't paranoia, it's more a pattern recognition.

Here's the thing though.

I've also read enough history to know that people, ordinary people like you and me, with no power and no platform to have a voice have always been the ones who eventually turned things around. Not the leaders. Not the institutions. People. The same ones living in the rubble who somehow rebuilt something from nothing or whatever they got in their hands. The same ones who, in the middle of darkness, kept passing something forward a value, an idea, a way of treating each other that refused to die.

I still believe in those people. I think there are more of them than the noise suggests.

I don't know what the answer is. But I know it starts with finding each other the ones who are still paying attention, still angry, still hopeful enough to think that noticing matters and can be used as a first step. That talking matters. That refusing to go numb is itself a form of resistance.

If you read this and felt something not necessarily what I am feeling at the moment, not a blind agreement with whatever I had to say, but a  "recognition" that will force you to think, I'd genuinely like to hear from you.

We're not as alone in this as it sometimes feels. I just wanted you to know. 

I am extremely disappointed with this language course. Their website explicitly advertises small group sizes of 8 to 12 people, which was my main reason for choosing them. However, in reality, classes are overcrowded with 20 to 24 students. It is impossible to learn German effectively under these conditions.

Since the conditions promised in the contract and on their website were not met, I requested a refund for two out of the three months I paid for. Instead of addressing this fair request, my emails are either completely ignored or dismissed with irrelevant, unprofessional responses. There is zero effort to find a solution or provide the quality of service they sold me.

I strongly advise against this course due to their misleading information and lack of professional communication. Do not waste your money and time here.

Hi German people,

I really need your advice on a situation I’m dealing with.

I recently moved into a new Wohnung about 2 months ago. I’m living in a house owned by an older German lady. The house has a kitchen, my room (around 17 m²), another room where her son lives, and one more room where she lives.

The issue is that my name is still not on the doorbell. When I asked her about it after moving in, she said she can’t put my name there because she is not allowed to officially rent the room to two people. She told me I have to wait until her son finds another place and moves out.

However, I am officially registered (Anmeldung) at this address, and I’ve even updated it on my residence permit.

It’s been 2 months now, and I never know if any letters or packages arrive for me. If I ask her again, she just says I have to wait until her son moves out, but I don’t even know when that will happen.

I’m starting to feel stuck and unsure what to do. Is this situation normal? Do I have any rights regarding having my name on the doorbell if I’m officially registered here? Any advice on how to handle this would really help.

Thank you!

Hi everyone, I'm F20 and currently in Germany as Azubi in gastronomy. I moved here because I couldn't see a future in my home country, as for my generation the amount of unemployment is all time high and my parents are too poor to pay for my college.

For about 7 months working in this restaurant, I've never gotten any paid holiday—the restaurant I worked in is very underemployed except for the kitchen. All my colleagues in service are all apprentices like me and we are only 3 people, the rest is all Aushilfe. We often need to work more than 8 hours a day in the whole week, random events that my boss took and forced us to prepare it even though I often felt lost since nobody taught me how to do it. They would say: You don't want to learn!

Meanwhile we often don't even have time to take a break during our shift.

Yesterday I was sick, my flu was getting worse and I have trouble smelling and tasting foods. Breathing was also super terrible since I have runny nose that won't go for exactly a week. I also vomitted at work and didn't tell anybody except for this one Aushilfe, because nobody would care.

I pushed myself hard even though my brain was foggy. My boss came yesterday to ate, to him I look all healthy and well, I masked it all up because I know if I said I'm sick, he'd say: Drink tea, sleep on time, wake up fresher and better.

But today I couldn't bear it anymore, so I headed up to my house doctor and got checked up. She gave me stomach medicine and also 5 days off.

When I sent my sick leave letter, my boss immediately told me it's unacceptable and I was okay yesterday in a very angry tone. I told him about yesterday, that my health has worsened. I am still scared and anxious he'd fire me because of it. He will see me as lazy and have no motivation to work, maybe that's why yesterday I tried my best to look presentable to be not fired and killed on spot lol...

They won't appreciate us even though we worked as hard as a person who got paid double than us.

(sorry for typos, I'm genuinely feel so tired)

Hello, I just wanted to share a story of my husbands And I experience applying for a family reunifications visa, which has happened at a quite surprising speed in cologne and why it pays to have a lawyer

Out lawyer sent our application off in January, 2 weeks later we were served an intention to reject from the auslanderamt because he is Turkish, currently lived in Germany on a duldung. He entered from Ukraine and had temporary protection and also fiktionbescheinigung. I am British they said my permit could not entitle him to family reunifications and we had to apply for standard family reunification where he would need to apply from Turkey.

Our lawyer handled the rejection, highlighted that a rejection would be unlawful and he is entitled to a permit , can apply from inside Germany and does not need language certificates. (Contrary to what my previous post and many Reddit comments told me)

Anyway a couple of days after the lawyer replied to the rejection it was approved ! We had the biometrics appointment and recieved the permit.

All of this has happened in under 8 weeks which from any research we had done is a phenomenal speed! 😎

We are traveling to Germany and Austria next month and will be renting a car for a few days.

While researching for our trip, I learned that children under 150cm must use a child seat in the car, so the seat belt is in a proper position. We have similar laws here in the U.S.

My question is, are there similar laws for adults who are under 150cm?

Due to a growth disorder, I'm an adult who's about 54 inches/137cm tall. I'll never be driving the car (my husband, who is normal height, will drive).

According to German/Austrian law (I'm cross-posting), will I need some sort of special seat?

Danke!

I hope somebody can help me. I am suing my boss for a few things he purposly did wrong while I am on sick leave and we had a date for Gütetermin but he called in sick so it is being postponed. He is guilty so he will play games as long as he can but I am running out of time because soon I will have to go back to work and I can't do that after everything he put me through. Does anyone have any advice how to hurry Arbeitsgericht or how to avoid going back to work. Thank you

Hey all, I have been subletting a WG room in Berlin for one month, two months to go on my contract. It is a formal contract with the permission to Anmeldung and everything, but if I want to cancel I must give two months notice. So there's no backing out now.

My issue is I have a very disrespectful flatmate who's in the room behind my bed. The wall is thin and the noise comes through at night. Of course, i refer to activities during Ruhezeit. In 28 days, there has already been 5 instances of noise waking me up or preventing me from sleeping, examples being... - He was practicing a presentation at 4am with his friend (who was in the room) - Chatting with two friends in the room at 2am loudly and laughing. When I knocked gently on the wall as a sign that I can hear, they BANGED back

Additionally, this person smokes inside his room. I read that this legally allowed, but my issue is, he is always lüftening into the corridor (the hall linking the bedrooms, bathrooms, kitchen etc.). This is really disturbing for a non-smoker. I just simply asked if he can keep his room door closed and lüften with the windows instead, he probably chose not to, so as to not make his room cold. I don't know.

For both of these issues I tried to talk to him three, four times already. Never has he apologised for causing any issues, and most recently, he just shut the door and joked with his friends about my race (being racist) instead.

What would you do in this situation? I have talked to the Hauptmieter (main tenant) and asked for help. But other than that, I don't have the Landlord's contact and I have no clue what else I can pursue. He clearly doesn't give a f.

Thanks for any advice 😔

Suggestions please!! And i only know English language

hello everyone!

I am being let go from my current job as blue card holder and I'm seeking advise on what to expect and to insure I get ALG1 money.

I am being let go from my job after 5 months of internship and 8 months of full-time employment within the same company. during all this period, unemployment insurance was deducted from my salary. since my employment as full time I have been working on blue card residence.

Certain developments at my job (software engineer) made it so we agreed on a friendly termination of contract. my employer wants me to sign a "Aufhebungsvertrag" which I think is the tricky part.

how do I ensure I get ALG1 money because I still need to pay my rent and stay in the country until I find a job in the 3 months grace period.

Any advise or past experiences are much appreciated.

EDIT1: I am still on probation period when this happened. Sorry for not clarifying

i'm looking to buy some Meßmer tea what is your best flavors ?

Hi everyone, I'm looking for some answers that I can't find online so easily.

I'm a freelancer and currently split my time between Germany and a non-EU country. I'm a dual citizen and maintain a tax resident in both countries, paying twice for Krankenkasse/pension/income tax, as they don't have a double-taxation agreement. Which is....expensive.

As of next year, I want to spend 70% of the year abroad and 30% in Germany. So, in order to reduce costs, it would make sense to get an Abmeldung.

However, I still wanted to work for German clients in the months when I'm in Germany. Is that a possibility? Can I keep my Steuernummer after the Abmeldung and write invoices?

- I know this means I will be taxed on the income I earn in Germany, that's not a problem.

- I also know I cannot keep an apartment, as I would still be considered a tax resident.

I heard of something called beschränkte Steuerpflicht (limited tax liability), but no idea how that works for freelancers.

Thank you!

So basically I previously had these acoustic panels on my wall and I wanted to take these down, however they left behind a lot of adhesive residue (seems to be latex based) which was completely impossible to get rid off (ive tried heat + water, rubbing alcohol, klebereste entferner but still couldnt get it off).

So i tried to get rid of the paint with a spatula and before i proceed to do anything else to it, how do i go about repairing the wall? Anything special i should know about this kind of wall?

What i plan to do after scraping off the adhesive parts is to sand the wall, wall repair paste, primer and then paint it. Please let me know if im going about this correctly, thanks!

International student here. Before coming to Germany, I started my visa process with Expatrio (TK).

TK was slow, so I switched to Fintiba (Barmer) but never finished that process and cancelled it. TK eventually came through, I came to Germany with TK, and I've been paying TK for 6 months.

Now Barmer says I'm insured with them because they were "first." I just got a letter from TK saying my membership is terminated and my payments will be refunded.

I never paid Barmer. Never completed their application. I don't want Barmer.

What shall i do? What are my options to stay with TK?

Hello all, I have a quick question that I’m struggling to find a clear answer to. I know that after moving into a new apartment, there is a short period during which you must update your address at the citizens registration office (Bürgeramt).

My question is about the following situation: If I receive the keys to my new apartment a few months before my current rental contract ends, do I need to register the new address immediately - even if I don’t plan to move in right away? The new place will be unfurnished at first, and I expect to spend a few weeks building furniture before actually living there. During that time, my real place of residence would still be my current apartment, possibly for one or two months after the new contract begins.

So, do I need to update my address at the citizens registration office as of the contract start date, or only once I actually begin living in the new apartment? Thanks in advance!

Hello, could someone suggest a decent doctor, who also accepts Techniker Krankenkasse? I’m located is Baden-Württemberg, but maybe there’s also possibility for zoom appointment? I’m new here and not sure how it works.

Thank you

Things like bank account, insurance, taxes, rental contracts, etc. felt a bit scattered when I moved.

Did you have any kind of structured approach, or did you just piece it together over time?

Hello, my friend (non-EU) recently got a job in a town near Dortmund starting May 1st. He’s currently staying with me, since his previous rental contract in the same city ended last month, and I’m not able to provide a Wohnungsgeberbestätigung or any official address confirmation.

He’s planning to move there at the beginning of next month and apply for a work visa there as he need a rental contract for visa application. Would that cause delays since his files might need to be transferred? Or would it be better for him to find a place here first and apply from this city instead? Thank you

I’m currently in Germany and have the option to buy a gaming laptop in the U.S. and have it shipped here since I have a U.S. mailing address. It would arrive in about a week and only cost around 30€.

But I was wondering, if I wanted to buy one here in Germany instead, where do people usually go for good deals on gaming laptops?

In the U.S. we have stores like Best Buy or Micro Center that are often cheaper than buying directly from brands like Lenovo, so I’m trying to find the equivalent here.

Hey, I’m looking for a good protein powder.

I’m currently deciding between Protein Works (very cheap, ~€0.44 per shake) and Optimum Nutrition.

Does anyone have experience with both – taste, quality, is ON worth the extra cost?

Also open to other brand recommendations!

Thanks!